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Are you always busy, yet not achieving much?

DSC05058Time management is such an important issue to me that in the early days of this blog, there was a huge focus on the subject. Plus, one of my very first posts, 10 Easy Steps to Improve Time Management and Reduce Stress, was featured on Freshly Pressed, which drove tons of traffic to this blog. It was obvious to me that time management was a huge issue for people, and for the first time in my life I was excelling in that area.

I periodically updated this blog with tips on time management, as I tried out new systems and shared what worked best for me. And then there was a dry spell as I focused on other things, until I came around the other day and wrote another post on time management. There were two great comments on the post, which inspired me to expand a little on one of my replies there. Continue Reading →

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How to Quiet Inner Dialogue

Are you hiding in a fantasy world of inner dialogue?Do you have constant chatter in your mind as you go throughout your day? I’m not necessarily talking about the negative self talk that we sometimes experience: that inner voice that drags you down and tells you that you won’t be successful or that you can’t do things. No, I’m talking about all kinds of mind chatter, including daydreaming: everything that doesn’t keep you in the present moment of what’s actually happening in real life, outside your head.

I used to struggle a lot with this. There was a period of several years where I was very unhappy with my life and what I was doing. I was working crazy long hours with little rest to recharge, and my life was full of chaos and struggle. So I spent a lot of time in my head imagining a better, happier life. It kept me going until I actually made the important changes I needed to make to shift my life from a torturous hell to an amazing playground that I look forward to living each day.

I knew it wasn’t quite right, but it was my survival mechanism. And then one day I had a conversation with a couple of friends, one of whom had been in a car accident some years earlier, and had suffered some brain damage. Another friend asked her what it was like. She replied that her inner dialogue was gone: it was like her mind had been wiped clean.

“Don’t you understand?” my friend asked her. “That’s what we all want in life.” And I knew instantly that she was right. Why? Continue Reading →

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Change Your Attitude and Improve Your Happiness

Seven SistersBack in 2004, my ex husband and I were looking for property in South America, because we wanted to expand our business there. We were looking for something remote and beautiful to create a holistic spa along the lines of the one we had in Mexico. Our focus was on the Patagonia region of Argentina and Chile.

The first properties we saw was located on the tip of Tierra del Fuego, that island (or collection of islands) at the tip of South America, split in half by Chile and Argentina. The drive from Ushuaia to the property was amazing. We had printed out directions from an email, and were going to tour the property on our own.

It was so remote. It’s the most remote place I’ve ever been. There was this sense that we were on the edge of the world.

We parked at the end of the road, turned the car off, and spent four hours exploring the property. It was huge. It was gorgeous. It was rugged and rough and windy. We had this constant sense that Antarctica was just out across the water, though it was too far to see it.

We had also forgotten to take water, so by the time we got back to the main road, I grabbed the keys and ran to the car to get the bottle of water. I was completely exhausted from four hours of climbing up and down and all over the property. I popped the keys into the ignition to drive back and pick up my ex husband. And that was when I realized that we had left the lights on.

The battery was dead.  Continue Reading →

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Do you suffer from torturing weekdays and depressing weekends?

2012-09-02 17.00.37I regularly check the search terms people use to find this website, and one of the search terms that most stands out from this week is: “torturing weekdays and depressing weekends.” I’ve been there, and I know it’s not pretty. And I’m truly sorry that there are people out there who are going through “torturing weekdays and depressing weekends.”

For me, it happened primarily when I was in a dysfunctional relationship for many years. I wrote earlier about how I detached myself from the other person and worked to get free. But for the years I was in that relationship, everything felt dark and horrible and hopeless. Or, as the person searching online put it, I was suffering from “torturing weekdays and depressing weekends.”

In my specific case, I knew exactly what I needed to do to free myself from this downward spiral of hopeless living. But sometimes, when we’re trapped in a tortured and depressing lifestyle, we can be so lost in the murkiness of our depressing life that we have no clue what’s wrong and how to make it better. So what do you need to break free and make changes? Continue Reading →

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How to find the strength to leave a dysfunctional relationship

Confluence

Confluence (Photo credit: abrinsky)

Many, many months ago I received a request to write about dysfunctional relationships and how to gain the strength to leave them. This is something that really strikes home for me, so I understand how important of an issues it is to address. Yet it took me since May to actually get around to sitting down to write this post. Why? Probably because it really did strike close to home.

I’ve trained as a life coach, a spiritual coach, and an NLP practitioner. Perhaps something so deeply emotional would be best handled by a counselor or therapist. Yet when I sought therapy to deal with my own dysfunctional relationship from the past, it wasn’t very successful at all. It did, however, give me someone to talk to, which I suppose was better than nothing.

What worked for me? Continue Reading →

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